Over at mom's for Christmas. I get into a discussion with brother-in-law
about how worthless the my Cummins 4x4 was in mud due to the heavy front
end. he has a 05 Chevy 4x4 z71 that is more technology advanced than my
outdated ram. Well my pride was under attack, by a Chevy gasser no less! Mom
has 14 Acers and a creek runs thru it. So I said wanna bet I can drive the
length of the creek bottom faster than you? he rolls over lauffing at me and
says "sure but you go first" So boys and girls here we go to the creek, my
trusted(1) Ram, and his fancy Chevy(2).

We agree that time started when the judges (our wife's) say "go" we would
than drive into the creek bed and follow it for 140' (fence to fence 155')
time would stop when rear tires cleared the bank at the other end. we also
agreed that the loser would donate $100 to the local Gander mountain. so I
pulled up to the edge of the creek and shifted into low 4x4 (his eyes got
big when I shifted into drive and the tire's torque a little. I hear "GO"
and ease off into the creek, deepest area is like 18", I turn "up the creek"
and ease into the fuel, half way up the creek ram is throwing mud 20 or 30'
into the air, moderate forward movement but I can feel the nose pushing mud
and I notice that I am losing "altitude". so I started working the steering
left to right. the swappers get a bite and the front end rises sharply, I
stood on the fuel and finished the length of the course, sharp left and I'm
up and out 43 sec.

I walked over to his truck and started "inspecting" the front end, he asks
me what I am doing, and I explained that I wanted to make sure his tow hooks
are heavy enufe to handle my tow strap. he yells oh ya, jumps into his Chevy
and tells the judges to say go. they do and he does, making pretty good time
en till he hit that spot about half way, his head lights submerge and the
Chevy stalls (he he, apparently my m/t's have left a sizable rut) after
"negotiating" a new tow strap, since mine was about to get very muddy, I
agreed to "try" and pull him out. my 12 year old nephew agreed to be the
hook up man to keep the interior of the Chevy clean. I installed my receiver
hook and backed down the creek, I eased back en till I felt the rear tires
start to sink than stopped. this left about 10' between our bumpers (12' tow
strap) nephew hooks us together and tells us that the hooks are about 6"
under the muck. I shift in to drive and let the idle power tighten the
strap, when the strap got tight I eased down on the fuel pedal, my beast
starts bouncing and I think I wont be able to do the deed, it is important
to disclose that we are currently working on our 2ed gallon of Southern
comfort egg nog at this point. I yell "come on baby!" and floor the foot
feed, the turbo replies with "Hell Yaaaaaaaa" and we start to move, he pops
out of the hole and I ease off the fuel, cut the wheel left and pull the
Chevy up the bank and into the dry. the Chevy still wont crank so we decide
to pull it to the house and hose it off, once we get the hood up and start
inspecting we cant find anything, he try's it "one more time" and it cranks,
runs fine, no problem.

I wish that I had pictures, but I don't. I will take a picture of my mud
covered truck and post it tomorrow.

Disclaimer: this post has no significant controbutation other than to
narrate the kick a.s Christmas that I have had, and to prove that I can
still type under the influence of "egg nog" so any and all misspellings are
"artistic expressions" on my behalf.

Merry Christmas!!