I find my 92 quite peppy, considering it's curb weight and small motor. I
don't tow my holiday trailer with it, but it does well with my utility
trailer behind. Slave Lake to Calgary on a single tank of gas - taking into
consideration the posted speed on the Edmonton to Calgary stretch is 110
km/h (meaning everyone does 130).

Truth be known, I don't think all that many vehicles have shortcomings.....
these vehicles suffer from their owners having high expectations after
purchasing something with the wrong head (little versus big).

These things are definitely NOT cars and anyone expecting car-like
performance is bound to be disappointed. However, the Ex can do a lot of
things that cars can only dream of. These things are nearly twice the weight
of any car you will buy. Contrary to popular opinion, they are NOT rollover
prone but on a G pad they will roll long before a car will (simply because
physics is physics).

Sorry you're disppointed with your chosen ride.... have a safe and merry
Xmas anyway...

The OHV is a little underpowered but it is pretty much bulletproof and
reliable. Maybe all you need is a tune up.

the hot spicy meat comes off in your hands.

6 live babies
1 lb. smoked sausage
4 lemons
whole garlic
2 lb. new potatoes
4 ears corn
1 box salt
crab boil

Bring 3 gallons of water to a boil.
Add sausage, salt, crab boil, lemons and garlic.
Drop potatoes in, boil for 4 minutes.
Corn is added next, boil an additional 11 minutes.
Put the live babies into the boiling water and cover.
Boil till meat comes off easily with a fork.

Oven-Baked Baby-Back Ribs

Beef ribs or pork ribs can be used in this recipe,
and that is exactly what your dinner guests will assume!
An excellent way to expose the uninitiated to this highly misunderstood
yet succulent source of protein.

2 human baby rib racks
3 cups barbecue sauce or honey glaze (see index)
Salt
black pepper
white pepper
paprika

Remove the silverskin by loosening from the edges,
  then stripping off.
Season generously, rubbing the mixture into the baby?s flesh.
Place 1 quart water in a baking pan, the meat on a wire rack.
Bake uncovered in 250? oven for 1? hours.
When browned, remove and glaze,
  return to oven and bake 20 minutes more to form a glaze.
Cut ribs into individual pieces and serve with extra sauce.

Fresh Sausage

If it becomes necessary to hide the fact that you are eating
human babies, this is the perfect solution.
But if you are still paranoid, you can substitute pork butt.

5 lb. lean chuck roast
3 lb. prime baby butt
2 tablespoons each:
  salt
  black, white and cayenne peppers
  celery salt
  garlic powder
  parsley flakes
  brown sugar
1 teaspoon sage
2 onions
6 cloves garlic
bunch green onions, chopped

Cut the children?s butts and the beef roast into pieces
  that will fit in the grinder.
Run the meat through using a 3/16 grinding plate.
Add garlic, onions and seasoning then mix well.
Add just enough water for a smooth consistency, then m

Oil for frying

Mix milk, eggs, hot sauce in a bowl, add chopped onion and garlic.
Season the meat liberally, and marinate for several hours.
Place seasoned flour in a paper or plastic shopping bag,
  drop pieces in a few a time, shake to coat thoroughly,
  then deep fry in hot oil (350?) for about 15 minutes.
Drain and place on paper towels.

Miscarriage with Mustard Greens

Why waste it? Otherwise, and in general, use ham or salt pork to season greens.
The technique of smothering greens can be used with many vegetables;
green beans work especially well. Meat is not necessary every day, don?t
be afraid to alter any dish to vegetarian tastes.

1 premature baby, born dead
Large bunch of mustard greens
2 white onions, 1 cup chopped celery
Vegetable oil (or hog fat)
Salt, pepper, garlic, etc.

Lightly brown onions, celery, garlic and meat in large heavy pot.
Add a little water and the greens (which should be thoroughly cleaned and washed).
Smother slowly for at least 2 hours, adding small amounts of water
  when it starts to stick.
Stir frequently.
When ready - serve with rice, grilled smoked sausage, green salad, and iced tea.
Coffee and apple pie then brandy.

Maternity Ward Po

salad, sweet potatoes in butter, vegetable platter, tossed salad with tomato and avocado, parsley new potatoes, spinich cucumber salad, fruit salad
Bran muffins, dinner rolls, soft breadsticks, rice pilaf, croissants
Apple cake with rum sauce, frosted banana nut bread sherbet, home made brownies
Iced tea, water, beer, bloody marys, lemonade, coffee

The guests select food, beverages, silverware... everything from the buffet table.
They move to wherever they are comfortable, and sit with whoever they choose.
Provide trays so your guests will not spill everything all over your house from
carrying too much, nor will they have to make 10 trips back and fourth from the
service stations.

Roast Leg of Amputee

By all means, substitute lamb or a good beef roast if the haunch
it is in any way diseased. But sometimes surgeons make mistakes,
and if a healthy young limb is at hand, then don?t hesitate to cook
it to perfection!

1 high quality limb, rack, or roast
Potatoes, carrot
Oil
celery
onions
green onions
parsley
garlic
salt, pepper, etc
2 cups beef stock

Marinate meat (optional, not necessary with better cuts).
Season liberally and lace with garlic cloves by making incisions,
  and placing whole cloves deep into the meat.
Grease a baking pan, and fill with a thick bed of onions,
  celery, green onions, and parsley.
Place roast on top with fat side up.
Place uncovered in 500? oven for 20 minutes, reduce oven to 325?.
Bake till medium rare (150?) and let

yellow mustard
1 cup seasoned flour
oil enough for deep frying
1 loaf French bread
Lettuce
tomatoes
mayonnaise, etc.

Marinate the fetuses in the egg-mustard mixture.
Dredge thoroughly in flour.
Fry at 375? until crispy golden brown.
Remove and place on paper towels.

Holiday Youngster

One can easily adapt this recipe to ham, though as presented,
it violates no religious taboos against swine.

1 large toddler or small child, cleaned and de-headed
Kentucky Bourbon Sauce (see index)
1 large can pineapple slices
Whole cloves

Place him (or ham) or her in a large glass baking dish, buttocks up.
Tie with butcher string around and across so that he looks like
 he?s crawling.
Glaze, then arrange pineapples and secure with cloves.
Bake uncovered in 350? oven till thermometer reaches 160?.

Cajun Babies

Just like crabs or crawfish, babies are boiled alive!
You don?t need silverware, the hot spicy meat comes off in your hands.

6 live babies
1 lb. smoked sausage
4 lemons
whole garlic
2 lb. new potatoes
4 ears corn
1 box salt
crab boil

Bring 3 gallons of water to a boil.
Add sausage, salt, crab boil, lemons and garlic.
Drop potatoes in, boil for 4 minutes.
Corn is added next, boil an additional 11 minutes.
Put the live babies into the boiling water and cover.
Boil till meat comes off easily with a fork.

Oven-Baked Baby-Back Ribs

Beef ribs or pork ribs can be used in this recipe,
and that is exactly what your dinner guests will assume!
An excellent way to expose the uninitiated to this highly misunderstood
yet succulent source of protein.

2 human baby rib racks
3 cups barbecue sauce or hone

I have a '96 with this engine, 124,000 miles, and have been very happy with
it.  I've had it almost seven years now, and I like it as much as the day I
bought it.

"Poor performance" depends on what your idea of "good performance" is.  I
also have a '66 Pontiac with a Chevy 350 engine, and that car will blow the
doors off the Explorer...but I wouldn't compare the Ex to the Poncho - it's
apples vs. oranges.  And I wouldn't trade acceleration for the utility of
the Ex.  Ever tried to load a 6 foot sofa on the roof of a car?  My Dad did
that with the Pontiac about 35 years ago.  It was ugly.  Didn't hurt the car
though, but don't try that with one of today's cars...you'll dent the roof
so badly that it'll look like the thing flipped over.

The Explorer with this engine doesn't have the punch that the V8 would give
it, but I get almost 20 mpg on the highway, and 15 in the city.  For a
vehicle of its size and weight, that is darn good.  I'm sorry that you're
unhappy with yours.  What kind of fuel economy are you getting?  And are you
dumping the pedal every time you accelerate?  If you are, you can expect far
less mileage than I get.  Do you use the cruise control on the freeway?  I
do as much as possible; saves on gas as well as speeding tickets.

Kevin

We have a 92 Sport, with ther only engine they casme with that year.
Underpowerd? I guess that's relative. It will certainly go fasst
enough to ge tyou in trouble, and would tow our pop-up pretty well,
even in the mountains from Phoenix to Cheyenne. Not 65 up all the
hills, mind you, but not much under 60.

Of course, I remember *truly* underpowerd vehicles; a 69 Datsun pickup
truck comes to mind.
Personally, I don't consider something underpowered unless it won't
safely merge into a freeway, and I haven't seen many that fit that
description (although I've seen a lot of *drivers* that do!).
Gas guzzler? Well, it *is* a truck; it's not designed to be an
econobox.

It's an 18 year old SUV; it's certainly not on a par with a 2004
model.
Our 92 is the longest-owned vehicle we've had so far, and it's still
serving us well. It's certainly far less expensive than a new(er) one.
It still runs pretty much like it did when we got it (in 93). It looks
like crap (paint is getting thin), but is mechanically sound, and
insurance on it is actually pretty cheap. It's resale value is about
$600, but in terms of replacement value, it's worth far more.

Maybe you're expecting more than it has to offer? :-)