Have you checked your garage for small, quiet, quick intruders? Take a
sack of flour and the next time you get out of the car, lock it. Then
take the bag of flour and spread it on the floor around the car, being
carefull not to step into the flour as you exit the garage. Then when
you hear the car alarm going off, simply yell loudly to scare the
intruder off, and go out and look for footprints in the flour. Make
sure you can recognize your footprints - perhaps carve your initials
in the bottom of your shoes or in your feet if you are not wearing
shoes. Well, don't carve the initials toooo deep in your feet. Of
course then the blood would be easily recognizable so maybe you only
need to put a couple of pin pokes into your feet if you are barefoot.
And do be carefull to only use real American flour  that you have paid
full price for in a regular store. Some of those dollar stores are
carrying counterfit foreign flour with all sorts of dangerous
chemicals and germs in it. But if your theif is barefooted, it might
be better to use the foreign counterfit flour since he or she might
get sick and die. Of course if you have a spare glass, you could break
it and spread the glass around the car, but not behind it or in front
of it and that way the intruder would be more likely to cut their feet
and contract a deadly disease from the the counterfit flour. And the
flour will help hide the glass from the intruder. If you don't find
any footprints, then it is possible that you didn't really have an
intruder trying to steal your car. Or they could have been hiding in
the car in the back seat behind you and they just got out and climbed
on top of the car and jumped out of the garage. So maybe you should
buy a second bag of flour and spread it on top of the car also. Or you
could just check for unlocked doors of opened windows. When you have
done all this in carefull detail, you may be assured that you have
eliminated the most likely cause of car alarm malfunction today, the
sneaky intruder trying to steal it. And that would leave it as a
malfunction of the car. But as we all know, these cars are perfect and
do not malfunction, so in this case you may assume you are going deaf
and hearing ringing or honking noises. So then you should be carefull
to go to the car and get in it and drive carefully to the nearest
doctor to get your hearing checked. Which is probably the reason for
Ray's question about having the keys in your pocket at home - he
simply wants to make sure you are ready to drive off and find medical
assistance because he has worked on these and knows they do not
break.

mcbrue in the trailer down by the river under the bridge not
prejudiced against kudzu

Yes, I do.