DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

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40-ish..........................................49

Adventurous..............................Slept with everyone

Athletic.......................................No tits

Average looking.......................Ugly

Beautiful...................................Pathological liar

Contagious Smile....................Does a lot of pills

Emotionally secure..................On medication

Feminist......................................Fat

Free spirit..................................Junkie

Friendship first...........................Former slut

Fun..............................................Annoying

Old-fashioned.................. .......No BJs

Open-minded............................Desperate

Outgoing..................................Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate................................Sloppy drunk

Professional...............................Bitch

Voluptuous.................................Very Fat

Large frame...............................Hugely Fat

Wants Soul mate.......................Stalker