Yes, this was recommended. I tried it, no luck. People keep bringing
this up.... I'll try it again, but damn, my battery is starting to run
low... :P

A can't remember, anyone tell him to trya and clear a flooded condtion
first?

Omit this part. I believe Tegger mention it already.

Remove a plug (or buy one) then reconnect the plug wire to it. Lay it
on the valve cover (metal part of plug) so you see it from the driver
seat and crank the engine over. You should hear a loud snapping or
see sparks. Don't do this for more than 5 seconds. If you are getting
fuel you'll just be dumping it into the on cylinder and not igniting it.

Otherwise, have a frined insert a screwdriver in the wire and hold it
near ground and crank away. Make sure he/she doesn't touch any
metal on the car or the screwdriver.

They also make spark checker.

http://www.etoolcart.com/browseproducts/Spark-Checker-In-line-with--90-degree-Bo
ot--TA23920.html

This link is the same as above.
http://snipurl.com/hc3g

Good news,  I followed the steps below and felt every click. So the main
relay is ruled out. Also tried the off-on x 6, the engine did not start.

The last reco is a little out of my league, I think I'd need more docs about
plugs and sparks before attempting that.

Not necessarily. All it means is that the fuel pump is running for two
seconds.

Reach behind the dash so you can feel the Main Relay.
Turn the ignition to ON (not START)
There should be a click as the Check Engine light goes on, then anoher as
it goes off. You will hear the pump run for two seconds.
Turn the key to START. At that point you should feel a THIRD click.

If you feel all those clicks, the Main Relay is OK. If any clicks are
missing, the Main Relay has a cracked solder problem.

If the Main Relay is OK, turn the key to ON, wait for the Check Engine
light to go off, then turn the key to OFF again. Quickly repeat a half-
dozen times or so. If it now starts, the fuel pump check valve is bad,
allowing pressure to bleed off.

If it still does not start, check for spark as you crank. Buy a cheap spark
plug at the store (doesn't matter what kind), pull one of the plug wires,
insert the new plug, hold the hex part against a ground, then watch the gap
as somebody cranks. Any spark?

When I turn the key to position 2, I hear a soft ~2-second whir which is
probably the pump, followed by a non-start. By your logic, that means the
main relay IS working OK, since I didn't need to slap the dashboard...?  :)

My timing belts are probably 15,000 miles old so they should be healthy.

Thanks for the helpful ideas.

=============================

You dont' even have to touch it to prove if it's causing the problem. In
a quiet place, turn the key to position II. Listen to fuel pump run for
2 seconds. If it doesn't run, smack the dash and listen. If pump runs,
it's your Main Relay. You car will now start, and the vibration will
keep the relay working until you shut the engine off.

Have you checked that that your timing belt isn't broken yet?

'Curly'

In an earlier thread (1994 Honda Civic won't start) people recommended
that I check the main relay to rule out a failed solder connection (for
example http://www.tegger.com/hondafaq/mainrelay.html).

Would it suffice to simply touch up the existing connections with the
tip of a soldering iron?

Looking for an easier workaround than re/desoldering just to rule out
this simple part...

Thanks.